Some Hobbies Are Timeless

'Fucks sake Karen. Play your character more carefully or I'll do something to teach you some fucking self preservation.'
'I told you before, Andy, that's my character's personality. Rash! Quick to anger! Hell, I put this in my back story. You had your chance to veto it!'
 I checked my chronometer. We were 56 minutes into this session. The two friends argued over character sheets and RNGs, while Ben and I rolled our eyes and distracted ourselves. Thousands of shards of ferroliquid display loomed above the table, simulating weather. Currently it was raining fire.
'I had considered the possibility that you would be mature enough to play it sensibly. Clearly I was mistaken!'
'Fuck you!' Karen ripped up her character sheet with a level of drama reserved for the faux-angry. Truth was this happened at least once a session. It was tradition, and we had all come to expect it. No-one really minded. Actually, we suspected that there was something going on between them. I made a mental note to ask Andy about it. Social drama. Far more interesting than the shite you get on the entertainmentfeeds.
Karen shoved her seat aside, moving to leave. Right on cue, Ben send a single word message to her retinal display.
'Karen...'
That was all that was needed to stop her. She didn't want to leave and we didn't want her to leave, however pride dictated that she put up a little more resistance, and like clockwork, she shrugged Rich's hand away.
I logged in. 'Come on Karen. You know he has a point. You did almost cause a TPK.' I smiled. Karen sighed.
'Yeah, yeah. Sorry Andy.' She picked up her character sheet and let the smartpaper knit itself back together.
Andy smiled, pulled on his GMing hat and reopened his feedscreen. 'Ok, let's get moving. Roll for perception guys.'
'16.'
'13.'
'Yes! Natural 20!'
'You all see a pair of eyes watching you from the corner of the roo-'
'I shoot incendiary bolts at it!'
Just like that, nothing had happened. Like I said. Tradition.
The weather had changed to breezy sunshine. Karen shot Andy a look. They were definitely fucking. I smiled inwardly. It didn't really matter. As long as they kept it out of the game.

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Pokemon: Tabletop Adventures - Episodes 12-15

At long last, I have listened to and edited for publication the next exciting installments of our Pokemon adventures.



Episode 12 (2:26:22)

In this episode Patrick and Yuki try their hand at fighting the local talent in Pewter City, while elsewhere a young mystic prepares himself for a gym battle, eventually going on to break Brock's Geodude with his shiny new Nidoran and it's Double Kick. Will the character's paths meet? Well obviously. Why did you even bother asking? Meanwhile, IRL the players are trying the Milk Challenge. Truly it is a laugh a minute here.

Finally I do some subtle railroading, and get the players to progress the plot.
The main bulk of story starts with all the them facing...a random encounter! Has there ever been a less appropriate term for something? The team find some Shinx, one of which Yuki captures to the tune of "DO WANT IT'S CUTE", despite Redrinder's attempts to gain maximum Exp from them. Duri9ng the course of this battle we find out that Patrick's Diglett, Dig Dug is apparently some kind of eldritch abomination, who devours it's foes in order to gain their powers.

Under direction of a mysterious stranger shaped remarkably like two long bits of metal that might carry some form of locomotive, they make their way to a small village just off Route 3. Ceil is a small village with little to few ameneties. They are greeted by Everard Joss, the village reeve (mayor, more or less) who gruffly informs them that the person they were looking for, Tara Gillian, has long since moved to Johto with her family. The group investigates the Gillian household, and locate a trail of psychic energy leading out of the village towards a cave.

This cave is guarded by a man with two fierce looking dogs, a Houndour and a Houndoom. The team are undaunted however, as Redrinder possesses the Houndoom, forcing it to run off a cliff, breaking its neck in the fall. No, really.

Episode 13 (1:38:23)

Following last time's horrifying events, the team move on as if nothing ever happened. Clearly they have suppressed the most defiantely traumatic memory of the death of a living, sentient creature by one of their own and there is every possibility that this will come back to haunt them. Just saying.

Progressing through the cave, all kinds of creepy stuff happens, with patterns swirling on the wall, amassing in a slithering mess of red light in a subterranean dome. Redrinder's Growlithe uses Odor Sleuth, dispelling the illusion, revealing the Mismagius hidden beneath. The group enter battle with the ghost, taking chunks out of it's health until it disappears, much to the irritation of Redrinder, who assumed it had actually been beaten. They then set about pokemon hunting, resulting in many Zubat falling, and Redrinder catching a Gastly.



Episode 14 (1:01:14)

Redrinder, having been stolen away by the Mismagius that had previously escaped, finds his way back to the group. Having done so, the group decide that they need to rest up. Burning through some snakes they make it back to village of Ceil, where they are taken aside by a kindly old lady and given food and lodging for the night. They wake up in the morning and deide to do some investigating. Heading to the Gillian household, Redrinder finds a pendant that, upon using his mystic powers, he works out belongs to the same organisation as the guy who attacked the others in Pewter. Shock! He also gleans a vision of the cave interior, seeing a large carvern filled with trainers working their pokemon to the limit, and beyond, and at the centre of it all, is the mayor! What does this mean? Who are these people? What will happen next? Find out....in the next paragraph!

Episode 15 (1:09:29)

In which our heroes go back into the cave. Bonsai tries to search for Abra. In a cave. Yeah. He doesn't find any. When they progress they find themselves faced with a wall of pure shadow. After some brainstorming and experimenting, Bonsai and Patrick team up and create a field of electricity through the use of Mist and Thundershock. This breaks the consentration of the two Haunter blocking their path, revealing them to the group. They consequently beat them. Onwards they go, finally making it to the cavern seen in Matt's vision. Alas, Everard was expecting them and the hapless travellers find themselves facing a room full of trainers.

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Pokemon: Tabletop Adventures - Episode 11 Part 2

Finally I got around to uploading the second part of the last gaming session.

Episode 11 Part 2 (1:55:11)

This one stars Josy's character Yuki a little more predominantly to start with, as she goes into Viridian Forest on her own to catch a Brock beating pokemon, something she finds in an Oddish. She goes on to train her Caterpie, eventually evolving it.

The group are rejoined and are chilling in the pokemon centre, planning their next move, when DRAMAZ. A stranger with a Koffing and a Weezing causes an explosion in the centre interior. The group proceed to act the part of Big Damn Heroes and run to fight the assailant.

The battle starts badly as Dr Bonsai decided to taunt God, however they quickly regain steam. Taking down the enemy Ponyta, they enrage the stranger, who assaults them with a large staff. After taking down the Koffing, the man continues his assault. What could possibly be his problem with the players? Bonsai tries to calm him down, but his efforts only serve to further enrage the man. Casey follows up with a heartfelt plea, which is backed up by Patrick's tried and true method of beating him senseless.

With little attacking power left, the stranger is beaten, retreating into himself, becoming a shell, capable only of basic thought. Casey takes advantage of this and persuades him to give her his Ponyta, while the rest of the team contemplate stealing the already stolen pokeballs. Luckily they think better of it.

After splitting up the loot, and the stranger is taken by the police, our heroes are left wondering. Who was that man? The group work out that he could be one of the "Demon Trainers" the city has been so scared about, but why did he attack them? Surely they will have to search for more information. Where will their travels take them? What new friends/weapons will they meet? Will the GM finally stop making things easy for them? Find out next time on Pokemon: Tabletop Adventures!

Lucky you gets 3 new soundbites!

One, Two, Three!

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Pokemon: Tabletop Adventures - Episode 11 Part 1

It's back, ladies and gentlemen. We return to our fictional world for a full hour and a quarter. Todays adventures merely rush us through a capturing and a couple gym battles in order to be prepared for the main event tomorrow. Nonetheless, there are some mildly smile-inducing moments, and if nothing else, you can be soothed to sleep by our voices.

Without further ado, part 1 of Episode 11

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Pokemon: Tabletop Adventures - Episode 7-10

 Another bunch of PTA recordings. Things are really starting to get moving now. My PCs can rest assured in the fact that there is in fact a plot and it is incoming. Ask me about cross classing!

For my players, Mystic Update PHB


Episode 7 (45:05)
In which our heroes are attacked by a Scyther. It takes Dave out from the beginning, slicing into his arm, leaving the others to fend for themselves. Yuki does so by running away again. At the end of a climactic battle filled with fire and blood, Bonsai throws a pokeball! And fails. Dave passes out from the sheer excitement of it all. Persuading others not to attack, and with Casey's pokemon enduring a fearsome blow, Bonsai tries again, and succeeds! All rejoice! Or not, as Casey points out that they don't actually get the XP if the pokemon is caught.

Episode 8 (57:56)
In which our heroes are still buzzing from their battle. Casey calls their old friend Youngster Shelly, not realising, given the dence forest that it is in fact the middle of the night.They swiftly escape the research place, and are attacked by crickets! Dave incurs the wrath of the gods as he is assaulted by a powerful Noctowl, and after long last, the group reaches Pewter.

Episode 9 (FT:FY)
In which I guess I caught a Missingno because the recording is corrupted as fuck. I have taken out the worst of it, and there is a lot of content left, albeit with sudden jumps in dialogue, but really I only bothered with it for the sense of completion in my music library. Scratch that. It actually seems to have been replaced with episode 8. Suffice it to say I am pissed. The fuck. Off.

In short, the group wake up, and challenge the gym. Bonsai and Patrick gain badges, while Dave wisely forgoes battling for now on account of his only having Bird types. He subsequently takes a quick trip to the Pewter Battlegrounds.

Episode 10 (46:20)
In which our heroes earn money in the tried and true method of trainers everywhere. Gambling on the outcome of fights. This should really be Episode 9.5 but I thought it would be nicer to end the year on 10.

Finally, as something of a christmas present, I present to you a collection of the best clips from the recordings so far.

Protected by this painfully adorable Vulpix
How is it holding that cookie? I don't know and I don't care.

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Pokemon: Tabletop Adventures - Episode 6.5

In which our heroes finish off fighting the Diglett. Except for Yuki. She ran away. The Diglett initially score 2 critical hits and a particularily heavy regular hit, forcing most of the party to switch pokemon. A particularily forceful blow from Mr Kipling, Casey's Mudkip enables Ace Trainer Patrick to catch one of the moles. The remaining two are quickly finished off, ending with a ferocious blow from Dave's Pidgey, "Superfly". Stay tuned for next session when our heroes face off with a dangerous foe...

Mediafire download here guys!

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Pokemon: Tabletop Adventures - Episodes 1-6

As promised, here are the recordings of my P:TA group's adventures. The links are in the titles. Enjoy.



Episode 1 (1:40:15)
In which our heroes continue their journey from the first, non recorded session. They threaten some chavs, consider extorting a small girl, critically fail stealing some pokedex, and get a guy fired.

Episode 1.5 (1:38:16)
In which our heroes stock up at the Viridian Pokemart and I explain the various leveling and experience rules. Dave and the Professor gain some on the side XP and catch a Spearow each. Nothing much else happens, hence the .5.

Episode 2 (2:01:54)
In which our heroes spend a lot of time in Route 2. Casey catches a Sentre, Patrick catches a Ponyta.

Episode 3 (46:52)
In which our heroes make it to Viridian Forest, Yuki catches a Caterpie, a trainer battle is fought, along with a random encounter or two.


Episode 4 (50:38)
In which our heroes enter the depths of the abandoned Viridian Research Facility, and our session is interrupted by some chav twats playing table football.

Episode 5 (44:33)
In which our heroes' pokemon level up, I realise I have fucked up the experience rules, and Bonsai not so much saves as aquires a family of Pikachu.

Episode 6 (35:26)
In which our heroes face some hurriedly created Diglett, and the GM learns a lesson in making up random encounters.

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Pokemon: Tabletop Adventures - Episode 1

A long time ago, an elegan/tg/entleman had a dream. It was a dream all of us who have ever played Pokemon have had, usually brought about by the question "What if I could...". What if I could be a member of Team Rocket? What if I could kill pokemon? What if I could focus on contests, without having to gym battle? And such things. And being a denizen of /tg/, he found others with the same dream. He realised that such freedom can only be obtained in one place. The Tabletop. And so it was that Dr. Mr. Stark and others created some rules that would be gathered to become the Pokemon Tabletop Adventures alpha.

I was not there at the beginning, alas. However upon discovery, it became something to look forward to. I downloaded the alpha, and had a look. Having never GM'd anything before, I (rightly) considered it too much for me to handle at this point. Nonetheless, like many others I eagerly awaited the release of the beta. Then it was released, and it was good.

And so it was that I got together some friends, and posed the simple quesiton to them, "Do you want to play?" After a couple innuendo based jokes at my wording of the question, it was generally accepted that this would be a fun thing to do, and after a few weeks it happened. We had our first session. It was decided that, while bumpy, it was pretty ok. Between that session and out next, I decided that I wanted to record our sessions. And that, my dear reader, is why I bring you here today. I have uploaded the audio recorded and invite you to listen and laugh at our 2nd session, in which I monumentally fuck up the rules, one of our players threatens a small child for money, and in-fighting starts between PCs.

Mediafire download
Episode has been reuploaded and listed in a later post.

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